My Lil' Peanut

Kayley Renae McLemore wa born November 24th at about 3am. She is absolutely perfect at 7lbs 4oz and 19 inches long. I call her my little peanut. Pumpkin is already taken by my other perfect little girl Makenna-seen here holding Kayley.

I will never forget sitting in my pastors living room and watching in horror as the first tower collapsed. I started pacing the room as if I had to get there and start doing something. Several folks from our church in Boston routinely did business in Manhatten, not to mention that several buddies of mine worked there.

Thank God none of them were downtown when it happened. There were several stories though of friends and parishners being way to close. One friend from church had been in teh tower the day before doing a tour. He had his family were supposed to have waited unti l 9/11 to do the tour, but he had to get back to Boston for work early so they did the tour a day earlier. I guess a lot of us have heard stories like that.

Later that week Dorie and I were flying home to Texas and we were on the second flight out of Boston on American Airlines since the "no-fly" ban was lifted. We flew directly over ground zero and everyone got real quiet as we starred down into the smoke. It was like a meteor had hit Manhatten and left a huge whole.

It is hard to believe that it happened six years ago. We have been to ground zero a couple of times and even then there was little sign of the amazing buildings that once stood there, except for two mammoth I-beams that had fallen down into the shape of a giant cross and for some reason the volunteers and workers had left it admist the reconstruction.

After it was discovered, construction workers, firefighters, police officers and family members began holding weekly Sunday services at the site. The names of fallen police officers and firefighters were also scribbled on the cross, along with the message "God Bless Our Fallen Brothers".

On the radio this monring results from a poll announced that 85% of Americans alive today say that the 9-11 attacks were the single biggest event in their lives.

Check out the current model of the building to replace the twin towers:

DANGER: This one is going to get Mushy!

I have been attempting to add a little romance in my marriage...yes I can hear the interns making gagging noises right now. But the reality is any man can romance 100 women 1 time, but it takes a real man to romance 1 woman 100 times. Think about that guys. So anyway I have been writing little notes to her on the above cards and this time around I found a quote that sums up a lot of what we have been learning lately.

Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.
Rabbi Julius Gordon

As Dorie and I grow together and learn more and more about each other, I have to admit there are some things at my core that I am not too proud of and I have a hard time sharing or letting her see. But as we reveal our faults, and darkest secrets to each other something funny has happened. What we thought would repulse and drive the other away, has actually brought us closer together. Our commitment is growing stronger as we open up and trust each other with our true selves. It isn't always easy, it can be downright tough, but in the end there is nothing like looking into the eyes of someone that has seen our worst and yet still loves us completely.
It is how the Father loves us. God knows your heart, you can't hide anything yet he completely loves you...There truly is nothing like His love. Today, no matter what you have done or how bad you think you are, Know that God has seen it all and He is absolutely in love with you.

Lonliness is next to Godliness?

This weeks time magazine includes excerpts from a beloved woman-of-God's struggle against depression and loneliness. Mother Teresa writes things like, "Lord, my God, who am I that you should forsake me? The child of your Love-and now become as the most hated one-the one-you have thrown away as unwanted-unloved. I call, I cling, I want-and there is no One to answer--no one on whom I can cling-no, No One.--Alone...Where is my faith." She goes on like this over and over again in letters to her confessors. She writes to the Rev. Lawrence Picachy, "Tell me, Father, why is there so much pain and darkness in my soul?"

I haven't read the entire article yet, but I am sort of in shock. Every time I read of a great respected leader's personal struggles it always shatters my perception of who they were. I would think I should know by now that leadership can be a lonely place. Take King David's lamenting in the psalms, or Jobs painful pleas to end his life--great men throughout the bible have lived through loneliness and doubt, and we see it today as well.

Dorie and I have been through our own Valleys and have tasted a little bit of what Mother Teresa describes. Those nights of utter loneliness and confusion when you feel like you have lost everything-even the presence of God. Those times when you can't muster even a seed of hope and all you can see ahead is darkness.

In those times, we simply have stood on the promises of God. One time, I just looked at this little wood carving of the word "hope" on our book shelf until I could feel a twinge of it again. No, we are not perfect and leadership can be a lonely place, but I heard it said once that on the other side of Loneliness is God's presence.

But the good news is that David writes about a God that is with us even when we, "walk through the valley of the shadow of death." There is nothing like coming through a valley experience to build your faith, but better yet to show you how much our Father loves us.

I pray for my students that when they are on the mission field and find themselves in a valley that they will stand firm on the promise of God to bring them through. It is something I cannot teach them, but they will have to walk through on their own. I believe in you guys!

graduation day!

I can't believe the day is here. Never have I have looked forward to yet dreaded a day as much as this one. I looked forward to it, because this is the first ever class to graduate (Christina will always have the honors of guinea pig 1 though) from the Fuel Curriculum. And I dreaded it because it would mean that our year together is over. I feel like Tula's dad in the movie, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" when he said, "Why you wanna leeeve me!" But alas, I must let them go, because God has a calling on their lives and the whole point of what we do in the FUEL intern program has to do with equipping and launching. They are equipped and ready, now the countdown begins. Elizah is heading to Honduras to teach English and help begin a youth ministry program. Randa is heading to Derry, Northern Ireland to work in the public school system sharing God's love. Sean is already in Florida training before he leaves for South Africa and then Asia to work with Book of Hope as a trainer. Manny is heading to Bombay, India to work with teen challenge, and Sarah is heading to Fiji to help begin a medical clinic and a university. Angie is going to help me here at the home base get the new class of interns up and running before she heads to India herself. Yea, you could say I am proud. I am so thankful to have crossed paths and built relationship with such fine people. There is no doubt in my mind that these students are going to change the world!

TEAM A horsing around at St. Pauls church. We had just finished the kids club and couldn't put the props down. J.R., Brandon, ME, Melody, and Jessica.
It has been a great time being with the kids, I just wish we had longer. It is only about 2hrs that we spend with them.
I am so greatful to be serving with the 15 members of our belfast team. All of them have worked hard to impact the neighborhoods we are serving in and they have blessed our missionary Jonny Caldwell too. I am very proud of them. Lets just say they know how to 'negotiate' very well!

marching day

The crowds were packed into the intersection on the Shankill Road. There was a buzz in the air as the different protestant lodges marched through the streets flutists, drumers, and twirlers giving it all they had. I always wondered why the children at our outreaches here in Belfast would use marching conducter batons, but at the parade where they sold childrens baton's and all the kids would march behind the conductors as they passed-I had no doubt why. It was difficult to imagine these little ones understanding that the groups they were marching in had very serious intentions that could be violent and at times sensless in their hatred of their neighbors not two blocks away. I wondered what beat that my children would march too, what heroes and toys would they idolize and what example I was leaving them.
Just then, one of the leaders from the church we are ministering with shouted, "theres my uncle!" Everyone waved as he passed by with his orangeman's garb on.
The whole experience left me desiring to seek God's face so much more, that his presence in my life would root out the hidden hatred, sin, and impurities that can be so nicely masked that I would never notice them without God's light.
Belfast Team 2007 is ready for the next week. We desire so badly to support our host church and pastor Jonny Caldwell. We will be doing al kinds of children's activities and neighborhood outreach to share the love of Christ...for all men.

can you take me higher?

Urban Challenge was challenging in so many ways. The 45 ft up in the air rope bridge, the zip line, sleeping in the same room with Chad Nance, Finding parking in San Francisco, but most of all on Tuesday night when the Lord spoke to each of us. It was one of those amazing trips. I will never forget the stories pastor Tim Gavigan of Glad Tidings told us of Smith Wigglesworth raising a man from the dead. The best thing was after Tim told us of all the amazing miracles that had been done in that church he said, "but we are more excited about what God has promised to in our future." That is vision my friends. He inspired us and we sought God till the wee hours of the morning and God spoke vision to each of us. My Word was to "Stand Strong." It was so appropriate as I have been fielding some doubt lately. Blessings

Four Star

Well it is off to MO for a few days of rest and relax...oh started dreaming again. I am actually going to MO to sit at a booth and go to meetings for the next five days. The cool part is the 4 star hotel I am in! Thanks poppa Steve!
Pray that our time with the leaders of the Assemblies of God is one of making new friends and connections to help us continue to support the youth leaders in the U.S.

I have been a ninja for God for the past few days in China. I am amazed at how beautiful the scenery is and how kind the people are. Total strangers make sure we get the right buses, eat the right food, and get all that we need as we travel through their towns. This has been the trip of a lifetime for me. We are looking forward to bringing our interns and teams here in the future and training them to be ninjas too.
hi ya!